I was a practicing Muslim for about 25 years, but now, at 43, I find myself questioning certain things about my faith.

A few years ago, I read the Quran deeply, and while it has many valuable teachings, I also came across parts that didn’t sit well with me. For example, there are verses about using slaves and stories of the Prophet allowing soldiers to take the wives of their enemies.

These made me wonder: if the Quran is truly the word of God, why would such things be included? Could it be that, over time, errors crept in as the words were passed down? Some descriptions of Jannah (heaven) also puzzle me, like the idea of having companions (Hoor al-Ayn) or rivers of alcohol. It makes me question if paradise is supposed to be a place for indulgence, like living a Las Vegas or Pattaya lifestyle.

These thoughts have left me feeling confused and troubled at times. Even with these doubts, I still live as a Muslim. I pray five times a day, give to charity, fast, and try to live a peaceful life with my family. But I’ve come to realize that nothing is perfect, not even religious texts. Instead of digging too deep or trying to prove whether everything is true, I focus on taking the good lessons and living a positive life. I’ve also started to appreciate all religions. I believe every faith has something valuable to offer, and we need them all in society to keep us grounded and united. I admire Christianity for its message of forgiveness, Hinduism for its spirituality and connection to nature, and I have great respect for Israel and the Jewish people for their resilience and traditions.

I think we’re all part of one big system. Humans, animals, and plants, we all depend on each other. Nature reminds us that we’re not in control of everything but are part of something bigger. At the end of the day, I’ve accepted that it’s hard—maybe even impossible—to know if God exists or which religion is right. I think when we die, our life just stops, and we return to the same nothingness we were in before birth. So, my goal is to live a meaningful life, embrace the good in all beliefs, and do my part to create a kind and peaceful world.